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Back in 1997, Sierra's British division sponsored a web site contest to promote the (then new) Leisure Suit Larry 7 game. I'm not sure which of these "pick-up" lines won, if any, but here's the entire list of submissions. Some of them are rather droll.

[looking at own crotch] Well, baby… it's not going to suck itself!

Are you a screen door, 'cause I could bang you all day long!

Are your parents retarded? 'Cause you sure are special!

Baby, I'm an American Express lover: don't go home without me!

Baby, I'm gonna make you so hot you'll come away with a tan!

Come to me, Lady, and let me slay you with my sword of love.

Congratulations, you've just won the keys to the city and I'm your guide.

Did ya know that a girl's best friends are her legs? But, remember: there comes a time when even the best of friends must part.

Do you believe in love at first sight or shall I walk past again?

Do you believe in love at first sight, or shall I walk by again?

Do you go for casual sex or would you prefer me to dress up?

Do you have a car? Could you give me a lift home in the morning?

Do you have any Scot in you? No? Would you like some?

Do you have flat mates? Will they mind me staying?

Do you have room in your handbag for the keys to my Porsche?

Do you sleep on your chest? Mind if I do?

Do you sleep on your chest? No? May I?

Evening, petty officer. Would you like to erect my mast and sail off on a naughty-cal evening?

Excuse me, I seem to have lost my telephone number. Can I borrow yours?

Excuse me. Would you like toast for breakfast or just me?

Have you got a map? I get lost in your eyes.

Have you tried the margarita in this club? It's hot, like you!

Hello, darling. Like a 20-ton polar bear, I thought that would break the ice

Hello, gorgeous. Would you like to know where I got this suit?

Hello, I think I may be having the best dream of my life! Would you kiss me to prove me wrong?

Hello. I'm Mr. Right. Someone told me you were looking for me!

Here's 10p, phone your mum up and tell her you won't be coming home tonight.

Hey, baby! Could you help me? You see, I've lost my phone number and wondered if I could have yours?

Hey, baby! Did you know your body is 95% water? Lucky for you I'm thirsty.

Hey, baby! Didn't we go to different schools together?

Hey, baby! Fancy popping back to my place? I'm positive something interesting will pop up!

Hey, baby! Grab the remote control, dial a pizza, and let's get naked!

Hey, baby! Grab your coat. You're pulled!

Hey, baby! How about coming back to my place and turn my software into hardware?

Hey, baby! How about you and me going clubbing; and I don't mean baby seals!! Ha-Ha!!

Hey, baby! How'd you like a smoothie like me to show you a good time?

Hey, baby! I'll bet you 10 bucks I could get all your clothes off you in 30 seconds!

Hey, baby! If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

Hey, baby! M y cock is leaving this club in ten minutes. Be on it!

Hey, baby! There's something big going on around here and I mean to give you the thrill of your life.

Hey, baby! Wanna take a gamble? You make the bet and I'll raise the stake!

Hey, baby! Wanna take a walk on the wild side?

Hi there, my name is Larry; Larry Laffer. What is a fine-looking woman like you doing with a guy like that?

Hi!! I'm Larry, I'm a big Bee Gees fan! Say: "How Deep Is Yours, Love?"

Hi, my name's Larry, Lovable Larry to my friends. Do you want to be my friend?

How do you like your eggs in the morning? Fertilized?

How do you like your eggs? Fried or fertilized?

How'd you like to come back to my place to see my collection of martial (or is that marital) aids?

How'd you like to see your feet in my car's mirrors?

How'd'ya fancy going halves on a bastard?

I bet you've seen a lot of accidents because guys must fall for you all the time!

I can't find my puppy. Can you help me find him? I think he went into a cheap motel room!

I like your legs so much I'm going to name one Christmas and one New Year's. Hey, can I see you between the holidays?

I'd love to see how you look when I'm naked!

I'd love to wake up next to you tomorrow morning.

I'm a computer nerd and I'd love to byte your bits as you have a beautiful graphical interface.

I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight!

I've got the looks, body, money, personality and class and I'm willing to share it all with you.

I've had a pretty bad day, and it usually makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?

If a man is what he eats, then I could beyou by morning!

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put "U" and "I" next to each other.

If I told you, you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

If you and I were squirrels, I'd store my nuts in your hole!

If you could have a date with anyone and go anywhere, where and with whom would you go? Well, would you like to settle for a runner-up?

If you think my medallion is big, wait till you see my joystick.

If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep till afternoon!

Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven?

Is that a ladder in your tights or shall I slither up your stairway to heaven?

Is there a mirror in your pants? 'Cause I can see myself in them!

Join me on the couch and I'll plump up your cushions.

Man: "Fat Penguin!" Woman: "What?" Man: "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice!"

My love for you is like diarrhea; I can't hold it in!

Nice legs! What time do they open?

Of all the chairs, in all the bars, in all the world, and you have to sit next to mine.

Perhaps you don't know me? My name is Mr Right.

Remember my name; you'll be screaming it soon!

Sit on my face and I'll guess your weight!

So, honey, is that a ladder in your tights or my stairway to heaven?

Take a tip from me; or, take it all, if you can.

Tonight's sky must be empty, because all of the stars are sparkling in your eyes.

Want to come over to my place for pizza and sex? No? You don't like pizza?

We may only be ships that pass in the night. But should we meet again in fifty years, we'll still remember our one night together.

Well, hello my pie-eyed saucy little skyscraper. Tonight is your lucky night.

Well, if you're not gonna buy me a drink, I suppose a quickie in the parking lot is out of the question.

What would you like for breakfast?

What's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

Would you like a drink, baby? Yes? Well, then let's have it at my place.

Would you like to dance with the greatest dancer in the world? So would I, let's go to the dance floor together to try and find him.

You are an oasis in my desert of life.

You don't sweat much for such a fat lass.

You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me!

You know, if I'm not in bed by 11, I'll have to go home.

You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away!

You, me, whipped cream, handcuffs. Any questions?

You're hot, I'm cool. Let's get together and even things out.

Your body reminds me of satin sheets: smooth, sensuous and soft to lie on in bed

Your dad's a thief; he stole the stars and put them in your eyes.

Your dress looks great on you, but it'd look better on my bedroom floor!

Your eyes are a like wrenches; every time I look into them my nuts tighten!

Your search is over, here I am.

 

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