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You May Be a High-Tech Redneck if…


Your e-mail address ends in ""

You connect to the World Wide Web via a "Down Home Page."

If the bumper sticker on your truck says, "My other computer is a laptop."

You doubled the value of your truck when you installed your cell phone.

Your computer is worth more than all your cars combined.

Your network’s wired with jumper cables.

Your wife said either she or the computer had to go, and you still don’t miss her.

You’ve ever used a CD-ROM as a coaster for your beer.

Your laptop has a sticker that says, "Protected by Smith and Wesson."

You ever refer to your computer as "Ole Bessy."

Three Words: Daisy Duke Screensaver

You start all your e-mails with the words, "Howdy y’all."

Your spell checker knows words like, "Y’all," "Yonder," and "Reckon."

Your cars sit in the yard because your garage is full of dead CPUs, printers, modems and monitors.

Your belt buckle is made from an old 3.5" disk drive.

You moved your computer desk so it didn’t block your view of your velvet Elvis.

Your mouse keeps knocking over your spit can.

"Smith & Wesson...the original Point-N-Click interface"

When you’re friends tell you, "nice boots," you say, "Thanks. New Phoenix BIOS!"

Your wife has ever caught you with a "Farm Animals of the Orient" CD-ROM.

You ordered a new pick-up with a gun rack and PCMCIA sockets.

Your PC Games collection consists of nothing but Bass Fishing tournament games.

You only buy from Gateway, "‘cause them cow-colored boxes is a hoot!"