Why The Internet
Is Like A Penis
It can be up or down. Its more fun when its up,
but then its difficult to get any work done.
In the long-distant past, its only purpose was to transmit information
considered vital to the survival of the species. Some people
still think thats all it should be used for, but today
most folks use it mostly for fun most of the time.
It has no conscience and no memory. Left to its own devices,
it will do the same damn dumb things it did before.
It provides a way to interact with other people. Some people
take this interaction very seriously; others treat it as a lark.
Sometimes its hard to tell what kind of person youre
dealing with until its too late.
If you dont apply the appropriate protective measures,
it can spread viruses.
It has no brain of its own. Instead, it uses yours. If you use
it too much, youll find it becomes more and more difficult
to think coherently.
We attach an importance to it that is far greater than its actual
size and influence warrant.
If youre not careful what you do with it, it can get you
in big trouble.
It has its own agenda. Somehow, no matter how good your intentions,
it will warp your behavior. Later you may ask yourself, Why
did I do that?
Some folks have it, some dont. Those who have it would
be devastated if it were ever cut off. They think that those
who dont have it are somehow inferior. They think it gives
them power. They are wrong. Those who dont have it may
agree that its a nifty toy, but think its not worth
the fuss that those who do have it make about it. Still, some
of those who dont have it would like to try it.
Once youve started playing with it, its hard to
stop. Some people would play with it all day, if they didnt
have work to do.