In London department store
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Bargain basement upstairs.
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In a London office
|
After tea break staff should empty the teapot and
stand upside down on the draining board.
|
In a Zurich hotel
|
Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests
of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested
that the lobby be used for this purpose.
|
From a Japanese information book-let
about a hotel air conditioner
|
Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of
war in your room, please control yourself.
|
In a Leipzig elevator
|
Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit
up.
|
At a Paris dress shop
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Dresses for street walking.
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In a Bangkok dry cleaners
|
Drop your trousers here for best results.
|
On a Majorcan shop entrance
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English well talking.
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On a Majorcan shop entrance
|
Here speeching American.
|
On the door of a Moscow hotel room
|
If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are
welcome to it.
|
In a Tokyo Hotel
|
Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you
are not a person to do such thing is please not
to read notis.
|
In a Bangkok temple
|
It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner
if dressed as a man.
|
A sign posted in Germany's Black
forest
|
It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping
site that people of different sex, for instance,
men and women, live together in one tent unless
they are married with each other for that purpose.
|
In a Norwegian cocktail lounge
|
Ladies are requested not to have children in the
bar.
|
Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop
|
Ladies may have a fit upstairs.
|
In a Rome laundry
|
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon
having a good time.
|
In an Austrian hotel catering to
skiers
|
Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of
repose in the boots of ascension.
|
In a Rhodes tailor shop
|
Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we
will execute customers in strict rotation.
|
In a Tokyo shop
|
Our nylons cost more than common, but you’ll find
they are best in the long run.
|
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant
|
Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.
|
In a Budapest zoo
|
Please do not feed the animals. If you have any
suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
|
In a Paris hotel elevator
|
Please leave your values at the front desk.
|
On the menu of a Polish hotel
|
Salad a firm’s own make; limpid red beet soup with
cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted
duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country
people's fashion.
|
In a Tokyo bar
|
Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.
|
In a Swiss mountain inn
|
Special today -- no ice cream.
|
In the office of a Roman doctor
|
Specialist in women and other diseases.
|
In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency
|
Take one of our horse-driven city tours--we guarantee
no miscarriages.
|
In an advertisement by a Hong Kong
dentist
|
Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.
|
In a Yugoslavian hotel
|
The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the
job of the chambermaid.
|
In a Bucharest hotel lobby
|
The lift is being fixed for the next day. During
that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
|
In an Acapulco hotel
|
The manager has personally passed all the water
served here.
|
From the Soviet Weekly
|
There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Arts by 150,000
Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were
executed over the past two years.
|
In a Belgrade hotel elevator
|
To move the cabin, push botton for wishing floor.
If the cabin should enter more persons, each one
should press a number of wishing floor. Driving
is then going alphabetically by national order.
|
In a hotel in Athens
|
Visitors are expected to complain at the office
between the hours of 9 and 11 daily.
|
In a Copenhagen airline ticket
office
|
WE take your bags and send them in all directions.
|
From a brochure of a car rental
firm in Tokyo
|
When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the
horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he
still obstacles your passage then tootle him with
vigor.
|
Advertisement for donkey rides
in Thailand
|
Would you like to ride on your own ass?
|
In a Japanese hotel
|
You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.
|
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel
across from a Russian Orthodox monastery
|
You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous
Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers
are buried daily except Thursday.
|